Day One: Santa Barbara - Wheeler Gorge Campground

Aware of the fact that it was our last hour to be pampered, we happily scarfed down a couple bowls of gourmet oatmeal (thanks, Mariott) and a whole lot of fruit. Slater’s folks carted us down to Carpinteria State Beach, where the rangers offered us a complimentary 15 minute drop-off pass. If any of you have parents (I’m assuming we all do), you know that 15 minutes is not nearly enough time for send-off photos. Nonetheless, a kind vagabond named Scotty decided that he should spend those 15 minutes with all of us, while inspecting our gear and smoking a joint. He did have a few helpful hints, however, given that he lives on a bike. He told us of a bike shop just a few blocks away, since Slater had a missing piece on his tube valve. We trekked over, but the store was closed, so we said our goodbyes to Slater’s parents, and said “screw it” to the valve.

Minutes later, we found ourselves at a gas station to stock up on grub. We took off for the day and encountered a few fun things just toward the beginning, including what we were sure was a drug dealer’s mansion just off of 192. I mean, seriously, who lives in the middle of nowhere, California, with a giant castle for a home and concrete lions surrounding it? Drug dealers. Anyways…

The day was full of breaks, urges to throw up, questioning how on earth we hadn’t trained, and eventually, the relief of a steady downhill for a few miles. After merging onto Highway 150, we began to trek the same mountains that we had called “soooo beautiful” just the day before (yeah, mountains look quite beautiful from the view of a hotel pool). We climbed, climbed, and climbed some more until we reached what we believed to be a gas station—but nope, it was a paint shop. I don’t know about you, but I’m not a huge fan of paint for lunch. So we continued, and eventually rolled into a town called Ojai (which we like to pronounce, “Oh, heeeeeyyy”), where we found a grocery store and took a long lunch that consisted of a chipotle chicken wrap, a giant bag of barbecue chips, a blueberry muffin, Hi-Chews, and a lime cucumber flavored Gatorade. We bought some food for dinner as well, then chatted with some locals. There was one lovely gentleman who insisted on telling us what our route was:

“So you’re taking route 66?”

- “No, we’re mapping out our own route, but we might hit Route 66 at some point!”

“Well if you’re going across the South, then you’re going to take Route 66 almost the whole way across.”

Okay, well, we’re not. Another man who had extremely white teeth and a very short attention span was extremely fascinated by our bikes and told us that he hopes to take the same trip someday. We left on that note and took off further into Los Padres National Forest (also known as Hell). Somewhere along the road, an Australian bicyclist snuck up on me and shouted an excited, “HI!” that nearly threw me on the side of the road. She informed us that just ahead was the USA’s Smallest Post Office, of course adorned by a “Ripley’s Believe It or Not!” sign. She also told me that I needed to wear cycling shorts of else my legs were going to become really raw. I was tempted to pull the, “I’ve done this before” card, but I refrained. Also, what kind of bike is she riding where her legs are rubbin’ all up on it? She should get a new one (just kidding, it was way more expensive than mine).

The rest of the day consisted of Slater yelling, “F*$@#!” time after time, and yelling it once more when he saw that the campground where we were hoping to sleep was closed. Well, turns out, all we had to do was look across the road, because that “campground” was actually just a national forest visitor center, and the Wheeler Gorge campground was just across the way. We checked into site number seven, and the camp hosts were kind enough to let us use their landline to inform our parents that we were, in fact, alive. They also let us know that there would be no water for the next 65 miles, and they had no running water at the campground due to the California draught. Awesome. They also weren’t quick to offer us any, so we saved the water we had and instead went crazy on some turkey sandwiches, fancy dried pears (the label insisted they were fancy), and warm Greek salad, thanks to the sun. After a couple of hours of talking and hanging in our hammocks, we retired to the tent and slept like babies.

Photos soon to come--that is, as soon as our connection is strong enough to upload them!